You are far more powerful than you think you are. Life will always bring circumstances that we cannot change, but how you respond to those circumstances will be the defining moments.
The power you have to change your mind frame when faced with a situation is incredible. Imagine the days when you’re in traffic on the highway on your way to a meeting or appointment and someone just cuts you off. Do you focus on that person who cut you off? Or on the hundreds of other cars who didn’t? Do you think about other times you’ve been the one to cut someone off because you were in a rush to get to a loved one in an emergency? Or simply just made a mistake and didn’t realize you were cutting someone off?
The mind is a powerful thing. It is a muscle. Imagine that you're way of thinking is also a muscle. The more you workout your positive mindset, the more it'll grow, and eventually become stronger. For those of you who struggle with optimism/positivity, think of it as a destination you haven't really driven to. At first, you need a map to get there, some support and direction, but after a while, your brain is wired with the map and you're able to get there on your own. Bad things happen all the time, but it’s up to you to decide whether you’re going to fall victim to those bad things, or take action, or let it go because it’s simply not worth it. Some tips you can try the next time you're faced with something frustrating or negative:
1) Give yourself a time limit on being upset. This doesn't only limit how much you'll get to be upset about something, it also allows you time to be upset! It's ok to be frustrated sometimes. Allowing yourself to expression some negative emotions/feelings is good practice on feeling expression.
2) Ask yourself "what are you going to do about it". As you're frustrated, think about possible (and healthy) action steps to lessen your frustrations.
3) Vent it out! Talk to someone who you trust will listen to you. Let them know if this is a "feel it" or "fix it" situation, and just talk about what is upsetting you. (A safe space can be therapy! Shameless plug)
4) Stop and think about intent. If someone upset you, take time to think "did they do so with malicious intent?" Often times, no one is out to make you upset or angry. If what happened did not have malicious intent, it could ease some of the frustration and leave room for healthy discussion about intent vs. impact.
5) Practice Reframing. This one is a tough one, but essentially it means to practice thinking about the positive side in a tough situation. It may be cliche to think about silver linings.